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On Being a Godly Spouse

It is my husband’s birthday today. We have been married for almost 10 years now and he remains to be the patient and kind man as I have known him before. I never cease to praise the Lord for gifting me with a faithful and godly man. In his birthday, at 38 years old, I would like to give attention to the passage about husband and wife on Ephesians 5:22-33. But I would like to focus more on the instruction to the wives.

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. This instruction is explicitly given in verse 22 with the explanation, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” – Ephesians 5:23-24. In our 10-year marriage, I guess, we have not really had any major issues on submission. If I would have to rate my submission to my husband honestly, on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the highest), I would rate myself in 8 or 9. This does not mean that he rules and decides in everything. We share in decision-making but I have always respected his decisions and plans. One reason is because my husband can decide well. That is proven and tested. He really is a decision-maker. I am not. I am somewhat dependent on him in making decisions. I am grateful to have a husband who decides not only with authority but also with wisdom, cautiousness, and love for the family in mind. Generally, I have no problem submitting to him. We have been good friends before we landed into a romantic relationship, and we pretty knew each other, for some time. We have been in a relationship for 5 years before we decided to get married. The years we have been together as friends and as a couple have helped us adjust to one another. It is easier for us now to deal with each other and on the things we would like to do together as husband and wife. However, submitting to him in a way that is pleasing to the Lord should not only be based on how adjusted we are to one another. While that is a factor, God gives us the primary reason why wives should submit to their husbands. The primary reason is because that shows our reverence for Jesus Christ. When we submit to our husbands, we are ultimately giving reverence to the Lord. Submission, in this context, do not refer to blind obedience to the husband even in cases of marital abuse (physical, emotional, mental, or sexual abuses). Some may give excuses that it is all right to obey and submit even when they are already abused. It is not so. Our submission is unto the Lord. Abuses do not glorify God. It does not give reverence to Him. As wives are asked to submit, husbands also are commanded to love their wives as they love their own bodies (Ephesians 5:28). Submitting to one another, such as children to parents, young ones to older people, the wife to the husband, and especially, the church to Christ, is an act of love for one another and for God. By doing this, we ultimately obey the commandment of Christ, to love God and to love others (Matthew 22:37-39).

Published by Deborah Agustin

A High School Teacher who loves to write.

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